At First It Felt Like A 'Nightmare On Lemerand.' The Story Didn't End 42-28. Then It Wasn’t. Was It?

Head coach Dan Mullen said after the game, “Calling a win ‘disappointing’ is disrespectful to the game and our players.”

Photo by Chris Spears

By CARLTON REESE

GatorBait Columnist

Amid the conversations overheard during Saturday’s circus was that this season has turned into a “horror movie” for the Florida Gators. The slashing and gory bloodletting of this campaign may be reminiscent of “A Nightmare on Elm Street,” but that’s where the analogy ends, because in a motion picture one generally has a good idea of how things will turn out – the monster eventually succumbs to the forces of good. By contrast, no one knows where this thing in Gainesville is headed.

When the buzzer sounded at Florida Field, the scoreboard read 'Gators 70, Bulldogs 52’ but everyone walking back to their cars knew the only score that mattered was ‘Samford 42, Florida 28.’ Oh, to have witnessed the guffaws and gaiety of those tailgaters in Knoxville and Tallahassee as they swigged their beer and gnawed on ribs, reveling in what for them has become an enjoyable farce that defines the program of their hated rival to the south.

Yes, at one point late in the first half Florida trailed Samford, a 42-point loser at home to Tennessee-Chattanooga three weeks ago, by two touchdowns. This was not a lead built on fluke gadget plays, odd bounces and Florida offensive miscues – no, the Samford offense earned every bit of 42 points in just under 27 minutes of play. The Bulldogs marched 75 yards on their opening drive and followed that up with drives of 75, 79, 44 and 87 yards with a 98- yard kickoff return to boot. Those are numbers of an offense that outmuscles, outclasses and outcoaches its opponent.

But was it, really? It seemed something else may have been at play, because it’s not plausible for Samford to accomplish what neither Alabama nor Georgia could come close to: piling up close to 400 yards and 42 points in one half of play against the Florida defense. It’s not as though the Gator defenders weren’t trying – there was a fair amount of effort – it may be that there just wasn’t a whole lot of heart, something that provides the extra needed gear at this level, lest one become exposed by inferior talent.

Could it also be that there wasn’t a very good defensive game plan for this one? Considering the defensive coordinator was fired six days before, it stands to reason that less coaching might naturally take its toll on the performance of a beleaguered unit. Once again, be careful what you wish for, and wishing for the heads of two assistant coaches in mid gag-reflux generally carries with it negative implications.

At 42-28 with 3:17 to play in the half, nothing mattered beyond that point – the shame and embarrassment were permanently ensconced in our collective memory. The humiliation was so thorough that its stain would mar any defensive heroics that would come later. Ten sacks and negative-50 yards could have been the remainder of Florida’s defensive performance Saturday and it would never have made up for that first half of futility.

Head coach Dan Mullen said after the game, “Calling a win ‘disappointing’ is disrespectful to the game and our players.” Well, in that case consider respect coming from this side of the table sorely lacking. When this game made its way on to the schedule, its purpose was as a glorified scrimmage to allow players to heal at the end of a grueling SEC season. From where, then, is the respect supposed to come?

How will this movie end? Next week it’s a trip to Missouri, where the vaunted South Carolina Gamecocks came up empty Saturday night, so matters do not portend well for a UF defensive squad lacking in confidence, intensity and schematics.

Is there anyone else on the staff Mullen can fire, so as to assure everyone he’s on the case? Addition through subtraction did, after all, yield a victory this time – so why not send another assistant coach out to pasture? Perhaps there is another graduate assistant waiting in the wings to step in for Wesley McGriff or Jules Montinar, whose secondary surrendered 416 yards passing to Samford. The less coaches the better, right?

Sarcasm aside, Nick Saban could loan his whole staff to Florida and it would make no difference with the players’ intensity level akin to an afternoon nap. The sideline seemed business as usual even when the Bulldogs were face-planting them – the usual fracas among cornered animals never materialized.

For Florida to have a chance in Missouri or at home the following week against a now-confident FSU squad, it must play like the desperate team it is. Shootouts will not likely produce victories against the upcoming opponents which are fighting for their bowl-eligibility lives. No doubt the Tigers and Seminoles will play with the desperation necessary to scratch their way into the postseason, but it remains to be seen if the Gators are even aware of their own desperation to win that magical sixth game.

On offense, schemes work even when the intensity lags – sometimes too much intensity hinders execution for an offense. On defense, however, intensity wins. Precision and execution take a back seat to the desire to hit someone at any cost. Perhaps former DC Todd Grantham’s schemes encouraged more thinking and less passion and physicality – who knows? Perhaps one more week without Grantham will provide the comfort zone these players seek.

Grasping at straws? Yes. But at least my effort is intense.